Sloppy Seconds
"Destroyed"
- "I Don't Wanna Be a Homosexual" (5:02)
- "Come Back Traci" (2:00)
- "Take You Home" (1:22)
- "Black Roses" (2:22)
- "Runnin' from the C.I.A." (2:00)
- "The Horror of Party Beach" (2:08)
- "Black Mail" (2:48)
- "So Fucked Up" (2:33)
- "Leavin' on a Jet Plane" (2:32)
- "Germany" (2:18)
- "Janie is a Nazi" (2:36)
- "I Want 'Em Dead" (3:32)
- "If I Had a Woman" (2:52)
- "Veronica" (2:42)
- "The Candy Man" (1:33)
- "Steal Your Beer" (1:39)
- "Time Bomb" (1:55)
One day I was browsing in the record store and came across a crappy vinyl single called,
"I Don't Wanna Be a Homosexual" by Sloppy Seconds. It looked so funny that I bought it on
sight. Then when I listened to it, my snickering escalated into howls of laughter! The song
became an insta-classic with me and my friends, and we would often break into an impromptu
singalong at the drop of a hat.
Eventually I found the CD that the song came from. The rest is typical silly-punk, nothing
exciting. (The rendition of John Denver's "Leaving on a Jet Plane" is pretty cool, though.)
Still, it was well worth the money to get "Homosexual" on CD, which is slightly longer than the
single version & starts with a funny conversation between the singer & his aunt, where he's
trying to convince her that he's not gay...
Oh yeah...on the surface, some people may assume that it's a totally anti-gay song. It
isn't, trust me. Here, read the lyrics yourself and you'll see that it's nothing but silly:
I DON'T WANT TO BE A HOMOSEXUAL
People are telling me that I'm missing out on the fun
'Cause I don't go anywhere and I don't meet anyone
But I know how rumors fly
When you're a lonely guy
And I'm here to tell you it's a lie
There's strange things going on at night most everywhere
You know those places well and you've never seen me there
I walk by other men
And I don't notice them
But then those rumors start again
So I'm gonna tell the world
I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
I'm gonna find find a girl
'Cause I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
I guess that it's okay
If other guys are gay
But my hormones are one-directional
And I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
Somebody tell me what I did to start this talk
Is it the way I look, is it the way I walk?
Is it the clothes I wear
That make the people stare?
Is it the way I comb my hair?
I'm only hoping maybe there will come a day
When I can make them understand that I'm not gay
But till that day is near
I guess I'll live in fear
And I curse the day I pierced my ear!
There's nothing wrong with me
I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
Know what I want to be
And I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
Soft boys and closet queens
Think Judy Garland's keen
But I don't think she's nothing special
And I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
So now I'm wondering if maybe they're not right
I've gone all paranoid and I can't sleep at night
I went to see the shrink
What did the doctor think?
I swear to God I saw him wink...
I pray that I'm not wrong
I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
Why did I write this song?
'Cause I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
I hope it's not too late
For them to set me straight
I gotta see a real professional
'Cause I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
No, no no no no
No no no no no
No no no no, no, no
I DON'T WANNA BE,
I DON'T WANNA BE,
I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
I DON'T WANNA BE,
I DON'T WANNA BE,
I DON'T WANNA BE A HOMOSEXUAL
I DON'T WANNA BE,
I DON'T WANNA BE...
Copyright information unavailable. Lyrics reprinted without permission.
on crappy vinyl:
- "I Don't Wanna Be a Homosexual"
-- 7" single b/w "Human Waste"
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